Divorce is an incredibly important process for many of us, signifying the formal end of a relationship. Whether it is for better or for worse, this process is teeming with complexities, paperwork, and conflict, which can make it a very hard stage to overcome. Divorce is also littered with hidden costs, making it an expensive ordeal for just about anyone. Fortunately, this article will label the costs surrounding a typical divorce and what you can do to manage them.
What Is Divorce?
According to the Cambridge English Dictionary, a divorce is a legal process that marks the official end of a marriage.
Types of Divorce
Despite its blunt definition, divorce is very diverse and comes in many different forms. Listed below are just a few examples of modern divorce.
- No-Fault Divorce: Attributed to couples where there is more than one source to blame for the end of a marriage such as adultery or general unhappiness throughout the relationship.
- Uncontested Divorce: A separation that does not need to be carried out in court because both parties mutually accept the separation.
- Contested Divorce: Usually taken into court because one of the partners does not agree with the prospect.
- Pro Se Divorce: Each couple has decided to represent themselves in court, eliminating the need for an attorney.
- Default Divorce: In this operation, one partner has requested a divorce, but the other partner has not responded to the request, usually because they cannot be located or contacted.
- Collaborative Divorce: Both parties have their own respective layers, who are determined to settle the case on their own behalf.
If you would like to learn more about the different types of divorce and how they would play out in court, ensure that you contact a local divorce lawyer for more information.
Signs You Need a Divorce
1. You Are Arguing Too Much
Though some forms of conflict are inescapable in a marriage, too much arguing can be a sign that it is time for a couple to part ways. If the arguments last for days or turn violent, you may need to seek out some divorce assistance to find out your next steps. Moreover, if these issues cannot be resolved after some time in therapy, it can be a warning sign that your marriage is only going to get worse.
2. Lack of Intimacy
Intimacy can take many forms including sexual, physical, and romantic. These acts of kindness are a crucial part of any happy marriage as they ensure that both feel loved and respected. However, if your relationship does not thrive on intimacy, it can leave it feeling stale, boring, or even loveless. If a partner keeps rejecting your need for intimacy, it can feel like they are pushing you away, making you feel like it might be best to split up.
3. You Are Considering Infidelity
We all fantasize about running away with our celebrity crush, but this is not based on reality and will likely never happen. But, if you are getting closer to a person, who is not your spouse and are keen to start a relationship with them, it is best practice to get a divorce before moving on to another relationship. Thoughts of infidelity can also symbolize a lack of passion and attraction in your relationship, which is also another sign that you may need to end your marriage with your current partner.
4. The Relationship Makes You Feel Anxious and Depressed
Most of us love nothing more than seeing our partner after a busy day at work. However, if you dread walking through the front door, it may be your body’s way of telling you it is time to move on. Nobody should feel nervous or worried around their partner, especially if they are causing these negative feelings. If you do decide to formally separate, you may benefit from divorce mediation, a process that encourages partners to split amicably, rather than bringing up feelings of adversity in court.
5. You Are Experiencing Communication Issues
Healthy communication is a crucial pillar in any type of relationship, especially in a marriage. When partners struggle to express themselves clearly and safely, the marriage is at risk of falling apart. For those who are tired of repeating themselves or not getting their point across, you may need to explore other avenues in order to find true happiness.
Important Factors to Consider When Getting a Divorce
Children
Divorce is often a tumultuous experience for the entire family but can be especially hard for children. To make this process easier for them, it is vital that you contact a child custody lawyer to ensure that both partners can gain equal time with their respective children. A custody lawyer can also help you set up an effective schedule, meaning that you can make time to see your children, whilst also juggling your other commitments such as work and errands. If you are looking to be financially responsible for your children, it is also advised that you get in touch with a child support lawyer to help set up a payment plan for your child’s maintenance fees.
Assets
We all have assets, whether it be a car, business, or other valuable heirlooms. When we experience a divorce, we may be forced to share these assets with our partner, particularly if they also have joint ownership of these items. Though it may be extremely difficult to part with these belongings, it can make the divorce a lot smoother in the long run. A family law specialist can help to manage these assets and ensure that they are shared fairly across other members of the relationship. This is especially important for family businesses that are eager to share profits among their children once they reach a suitable age.
Property
The marital home is considered to be a safe haven for both partners, but it may need to be sold when a couple divorces. A local estate planner can advise the best way to put the home on the market and share the profits between the relevant parties. An estate planning lawyer also specializes in end-of-life planning, making them a useful asset for those looking to organize their funeral plans alongside this new change in their lives. The belongings within the home must also be organized, which may take a lot of time if you have been with your partner for many years.
Wills and Trusts
A will is a formal document that details how a person would like their assets to be distributed after they die. Married couples often place each other in their wills, meaning that they may need to be changed once they divorce. Wills and testament packages can often be purchased online, but some people feel more comfortable contacting a local solicitor so that can be sure that the document is completed correctly. Trusts are similar to wills , instead they go into effect immediately after they have been signed, meaning that these documents need to be altered as soon as possible if you do not want your ex-partner to be a part of your family when you die.
Contact
Some couples try to remain in touch after they divorce, perhaps to remain friends or to create a loving environment for their children. If this is the case for you, be sure to set up a contact schedule for you and your partner. This could include weekly updates or simple phone calls. Whatever you choose, you must decide on a form of communication that best suits you and your family and ensure that it can be upheld for long periods of time.
Benefits of Getting a Divorce
Happier Children
Children are very similar to adults in the sense that they cannot function in a negative environment. If your household was once filled with arguments or even the awkward air of the silent treatment, your children may have experienced a lot of anxiety and stress. A divorce can help children move into a more joyful home, ensuring that they can continue to thrive and grow in key areas of their lives. This is also an important benefit for families who have experienced some form of abuse as a divorce can ensure that the survivor and their children can find a positive sense of safety.
Increased Confidence
Divorce can be incredibly freeing for some people, giving them the prime opportunity to get back on to the dating scene and enjoy the vitality of a new relationship. Many of us implement makeovers and self-improvement strategies to help us remove the shackles of our past relationships and show our true selves to our new partners. This boost in self-confidence can also help you succeed in other areas of your life including work, family, and friendships. As such, a divorce may be just what you need to gain a new lease of life.
Better Health
When we are rid of emotional stress, our bodies also revel in the positive effects. A newfound sense of calm can help our bodies reset and recharge, offering less inflammation, a slower heart rate, and lower blood pressure. After the divorce, you may even find the time to work on a new fitness routine, giving you a better body as well as an array of other health benefits. This is also important for those who lived very unhealthy lives before getting a divorce and are motivated to put themselves and their health first.
Improved Finances
With one less dependent to worry about, you now have a perfect opportunity to manage your money in line with your needs. Whether it is treating your children every once in a while or buying yourself a more suitable car, a divorce can offer you the chance to take your finances into your own hands and spend your money in a way that benefits you. Though this may take time, especially once the divorce fees have been paid, it can offer a vast improvement for your entire life.
Can Offer You a Greater Sense of Patience
Although a divorce can be one of the most trying experiences in our lives, it can make us stronger and more tolerant over time. This process is often linked with a lot of uncertainty and can force us to wait patiently for the next step. Over time, we can use these new traits to better our lives, giving us more strength to deal with demanding children or stressful jobs. Even though divorce can push us to our emotional and physical limits, it is vital that we focus on the good traits it can offer us.
Potentially Improves Your Relationship With Your Ex-Partner
Some people are not meant to be married, but that does not mean that they cannot enjoy each other’s company in different forms. Many couples find a new sense of purpose as friends or co-parents, ensuring that both partners can continue to seek out happiness, without having to struggle through their marriage. Though it may be unlikely that all couples will remain friendly after their divorce, it is a good source of motivation for those looking to create a sense of peace in this new chapter of their lives.
Divorce is by no means a simple matter and leads many to feel lost and disgruntled. It can also be very costly, especially if one partner has to give up or sell a majority of their assets, Hopefully, the information discussed in this article will help you to identify the costs associated with divorce and help you manage the stressors of your separation.
